


Monotony

by dangerbirb



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Attempted Sexual Assault, Blood and Injury, Drug Use, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Historical Hetalia, Human & Country Names Used (Hetalia), Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Mental Anguish, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Military Ranks, Physical Abuse, Prussia (Hetalia) - Freeform, Russia (Hetalia) - Freeform, Verbal Abuse, Violence, World War II, Yikes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-19
Updated: 2019-12-10
Packaged: 2020-01-16 14:04:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 5,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18523060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dangerbirb/pseuds/dangerbirb
Summary: 1943- in the midst of a devastating war, days pass slowly and colors lose their vibrance. Ludwig is stationed at a small military office in a quiet area of south Germany, spending his days doing his job and keeping his head down. After being torn from her homeland, Sofia (Ukraine) works in the same building, in Ludwig's wing, charged with maintenance. As the days continue, how do they cope?





	1. Lurking

**Author's Note:**

> CONTENT WARNING
> 
> This story takes place during World War 2, a setting that's pretty sensitive and difficult to portray respectfully. I do not by any means wish to lighten the crimes committed by the nations or peoples involved, or take a stance regarding the politics of WW2. I condemn hatefulness in all of its forms throughout history. My only desire is to portray these characters (Germany and Ukraine) as they are.
> 
> If you feel any of these writings are insensitive or in poor tastes, please let me know and I will try my best to correct my error. I'm not perfect, but I'll try my best to be respectful in the first place.
> 
> OTHER WARNINGS
> 
> This story includes scenes of violence, mild to moderate sexual themes, and mental illness.
> 
> ALSO
> 
> I've been informed by a reviewer that the context of the context of Ludwig and Sofia's characters is more ambiguous than I meant. Sofia and Ludwig are both fully aware of each others identities as well as their own. Physical injuries and sickness still effect them to a degree, but the two are indeed 'immortal' as the original source material establishes them to be.   
> Hope that helps, and thanks again for telling me.

"These papers were supposed to be delivered last night. Why are they still here?"

Ludwig's stern voice echoed through the halls as daylight shone through the windows, and Sofia swept the smooth hardwood flooring. She overheard the yelling demands nearly every day, no matter how hard she tried to avoid them. She'd managed to stay out of trouble this long, and she hoped desperately that it would continue to work. Any added stress to this environment might just break her even further, after losing her end of the war and being taken away from her siblings. It was agony to not be able to care for them.

Suddenly Ludwig's office door burst open, and a man bumped into her harshly on his way out, knocking her off balance and making her drop her broom.

"Excuse me." She said quietly, keeping her eyes downward.

"Excuse me?" The man said. "You ought to watch where you're sweeping."

Sofia felt a knot building in her stomach.

"I'm sorry sir-"

"Talking back, too. Maybe you need more discipline so you'll learn the severity of your mistake."

The tone in his voice made Sofia realize his interest in her had shifted. She peered up at the German soldier to find him looking darkly at her bust.

"It won't happen again." She assured him.

"Come with me." He said, grabbing her wrist and continuing down the hall.

Sofia's mind panicked. She pulled back and freed her wrist.

The man turned back to look at her again, his eyes growing impatient and he grabbed her arm before she could back away.

"I said, come with me." He repeated.

"N-no…" Sofia said, her eyes gleaming with fear and anger.

"Do as I say!" He barked.

"No!" She yelled.

The soldier yanked her arm, pulling her closer and slapped her hard with his other hand. Sofia fell to the ground, hitting her head, as well as her nose, feeling a nasty crunch, and a steady stream of blood flowing from her nostrils.

"You Russian slut!" He hissed.

"Wilhelm!" Another voice yelled angrily. Sofia's senses were impaired from the fall, but she was fairly certain she was hearing Ludwig's voice. Then she heard boots stomping and the ground shook. Her vision blurred terribly as she tried to look up.

"If I'm not mistaken, I asked you to send these files to the mail room immediately." Ludwig said in a voice that was quieter, yet somewhat scarier than his yelling voice. "Not sulk around my facilities and pester my staff. Did you perhaps mishear my instructions? Should I make them more clear for you?"

"No, sir." Wilhelm said.

"Excellent." Ludwig hissed. "Fuck up basic instructions again and count on having much worse luck with me next time."

"Understood."

"Good. Get the fuck out of here."

Sofia's senses dulled further and further until she lost consciousness, her eyes rolling backwards and her head falling against the hardwood floor.


	2. Reset

Sofia's eyes opened slowly to find herself back in her room, her head and her cheek throbbing with pain. She quickly recalled the events that took place and tried to sit up against her pillow. As she did, she noticed a silver tray on her nightstand, holding a pitcher of water and a glass, aspirin, and a form labeled “Mandatory Exemption.”

Sofia narrowed her eyes and picked up the sheet of paper, skimming the contents. The printed script had blanks filled in black pen by someone.

“You have been ordered to cease work activity for **5** day(s) due to severe injury to head. Please respect these terms, or you will be penalized accordingly.”  
Signed,  
**Ludwig Beilschmidt**   
Supervising Officer

Sofia's eyes inspected the quick signature. Ludwig must have been furious with that soldier. She'd never heard him curse like that to a subordinate. She always assumed the way he treated Feliciano was the same as how he treated his co-workers, but it couldn't be more different. Ludwig treated Feliciano almost like a misguided younger brother, but Sofia was certain that he’d have no problem with Wilhelm being dead the next day.  
She remembered her nose, and as she inspected it with her hands, she found it bandaged and splinted.  
Sofia narrowed her eyes. There weren't any nursing staff in these offices. This wasn't done by doctors.  
She glanced over at the handwriting on the exemption note. The signature.  
She thought for a moment, concerned and confused, narrowing her eyes and letting her fingers run over the bridge of her injured nose.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter is coming soon, this one is really short; I just wanted some separation between this and what happens next.


	3. (non)Escapism

Ludwig sat at his study looking over the strategic attack plans he was supposed to be working on. He peered over the marked pawns and enemy territory, feeling his interest being tugged to do something else, anything else. He was so tired of this. 

The part of him that knew he was supposed to get this assignment done egged him on, told him that this was going to have to be done by the end of the night anyway, so he just needed to buckle down and get it done. 

He held his pencil and brought it towards the draft paper.

He glanced at the clock at his desk. It suddenly sounded much louder than he thought it was. He focused back down at the piece of paper, marked with X’s and arrows and architectural plans.    
_ The X’s are foot soldiers _ , He said to himself.  _ Mark the foot soldiers.  _

He placed an X on the paper. How many soldiers are on this operation? 50. 

The clock’s ticking interrupted his thoughts again. He glanced at it. One minute had passed. 

“God dammit…” he muttered, covering his face with his hands. He reached across his desk for his cigarettes, took one out of the metal case, and lit it. 

Suddenly there was a soft knock at his door. 

“Yes, come in.” He breathed, letting the smoke out of his lungs. 

The door swung open and Sofia stood in the doorframe, holding the silver tray he'd placed in her room. 

“Sofia?” He said, his eyes softening. He put out the cigarette. “I've dismissed you, you should be resting.” 

“Yes, I understand; I don't mean to defy your order, I just wanted to bring back the tray and pitcher to its owner, and I don't know who that is.” 

Ludwig looked at the tray, and up at Sofia again.

“Ah I see. You can leave them here in my office, I'll return them. It's best that I take care of it.” He said. 

“Yes sir.” She said, placing the tray on the table next to his book case. “Thank you,” She said, turning to leave. 

“Wait.” Ludwig said almost inadvertently. 

She stopped and turned around, trying to hide her fear. 

“I trust your recovery is going well?” He said, maintaining a level tone as best as he could. 

Sofia looked at him, not quite knowing how to answer, scrambling for the words in her head. 

“I… I believe so.” 

“That's good.” He said. “I hope you feel better.” 

“Thank you sir.” Sofia nodded, and turned to leave again. 

As the door closed, Ludwig glanced at the silver tray belonging to him and thought of Sofia's fearful expression.

_ Stay away from her.  _

Ludwig pulled out another cigarette and lit it. 


	4. Drown

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning - Explicit depictions of violence are featured in this chapter.

_ “How old?”  _

_ “How many kilos?” _

_ “What is your health?”  _

_ “Go to line A please-” _

_ “Line B please-” _

_ “How many children-” _

_ “Line A-” _

_ “SOMEONE ESCAPED; SEARCH THE AREA!”  _

_ In the woods… She’s in the woods… find her…  _

_ The rain… it’s going to flood... _

_ Boots stomping through the mud and rain spread all over… _

_ Trees, grass, leaves, water, water  _ **_water-_ **

_ “We’ve found her!”  _

_ “Lieutenant, take aim.” _

_ “Lieutenant?” _

_ No… Can’t breathe… _

_ “Can you hear me sir?!” _

_ No… _

_ “Take her out.”  _

_ A deafening blast… I choke…  _

_ “Filthy pig-” _

_ “That infant would have been born to a hideous mother-” _

_ I’m drowning…  _

_ “Sir?” _

_ “Lieutenant?!”  _

_ “Is he breathing?”  _

_ The water… The… I… Stop… Stop… STOP- _

 

Ludwig jerked awake, his choking sending tremors through his body. He clutched his chest and covered his mouth as a few more heavy coughs cut through him, and a fair amount of blood spilled into his hand. After a moment, he gathered his bearings and situated himself with his surroundings. He looked around his office study, and then down at the sofa he'd slept on. He heard his clock ticking. It was 6:30. No one's here yet; workday starts at 7:45.    
He stood up and reached to his desk for his handkerchief and wiped away the blood on his hand and dripping down his arm, and then left his office to find the restroom. 

In his sweatpants and undershirt, the latter stained with blood, he paced through the darkened hallways of the building, footsteps echoing against the tall ceiling. The dark hardwood floors always looked like a night sky, especially when the sun wasn’t coming in through the windows yet. It’s something Ludwig always admired about this building he hated so much. 

He entered the restroom only to find that Sofia was still inside, mopping the floors. She jumped and then kept her head down. 

“Excuse me.” She muttered, gathering her things to leave. 

“No, it’s fine;” He said, hoping to save her some trouble. “I’m just going to wash up. You can keep working.” 

She stopped and carefully began to mop again, her movements calculated to be as quiet as possible. Ludwig knew he wasn’t supposed to be there so early anyway, he didn’t want to disrupt her work. 

He turned the knob on the sink and washed his face with the ice cold water, hoping to wake himself up, and leave the bathroom so Sofia could continue to work comfortably. He peered into the mirror, his harsh face looking back at him and he turned the water off. Then he took a paper towel and left the room, walking back to his study.

Sofia continued to mop, wondering why Ludwig always slept here instead of going home. 


	5. Imbalance(d)

Sofia dusted a bookcase in the conference room loosely, enjoying the space's privacy. She hummed a tune quietly to herself, as she looked through all of the books and their fine leather bindings. She thought of Ivan and his big collections of botany guides and encyclopedias. He always loved greenery so much. It had been a while since Sofia saw him do anything he truly enjoyed, it seems his bosses as of late had been getting more and more severe.

Poor thing, she thought, missing him dearly. She moved to the large wooden table in the middle of the room, taking a towel and wiping away the dust.

Natalya would always express so much interest in his hobbies, which was fun for Ivan until he wanted to be alone; She was absolutely relentless.

Sofia hadn't had any contact with her sister in a long time. Not since she was captured and taken to this office. Her siblings were capable, she knew that; but their emotional well beings in these trying times was often not the best, and Sofia worried about them every day.

Suddenly she heard a pair of soldiers meet next to one of the conference room doors. She froze, and picked up her towel, keeping her ears open.

"Here are the files he requested."

"Thanks."

The second voice she was certain she knew: Wilhelm.

"Any luck with him?"

"He's an absolute disaster. One day I walk in on him and he barely opens his mouth, and the next he's yelling his head off at me. Meathead. What the fuck is he doing here anyway? If he can't be in the field then why should he be my boss? They should've just demoted him."

"He can't be in the field? What do you mean?"

Sofia found herself coming closer to the wall and pressing her ear against it.

"Yeah. He was at a camp for a while, helping to sort the prisoners and one day he lost it."

"What happened?"

"Apparently a pregnant woman had escaped the area and he and a few men were sent to find her. When they told him to shoot her, he didn't move. Once another soldier took care of her, he collapsed and started to have some kind of mental breakdown."

"What, like anxiety? That late in the game?"

"I have no idea, apparently he was coughing on the ground and his eyes were wide open and he was breathing heavily. He doesn't have any health conditions."

"Jesus…"

Sofia narrowed her eyes.

"Yeah. They moved him here instead, but I don't know why they're giving him this special treatment. He failed to follow basic orders, and they gave him a job at one of the offices. If he's too much a pussy to be on the field, he ought to do us all a favor and go die in a camp."

Sofia slowly backed away from the wall and picked up her supplies. She moved on to the light fixtures on the opposite side of the room, her humming silenced.


	6. Abandoned

Ludwig stood outside in the mild spring weather, watching the birds flit across from branch to branch. He took a drag from his cigarette and saw one sparrow chasing another back and forth. 

Its wings turned downward and he landed on the ground, the other bird following him and landing close. They playfully hopped around each other. Ludwig smiled, thinking of Gilbert and what he'd do when he wanted something. When Ludwig walked around filling papers, busy with work, Gilbert would remain close behind, often getting in the way, saying his name over and over again until he'd stop and ask what it is he wanted. Usually the request would be to go out drinking with him. Often it was far too early in the day. 

Ludwig chuckled as he breathed the cigarette smoke away. 

The birds suddenly flew, along with the tens of others residing in the trees. Ludwig raised an eyebrow and peered into the sky above, squinting his eyes from the sun. 

Shadows… whirring engines… 

Ludwig's mind suddenly sharpened into focus, his heart blasting in his ears. He threw his cigarette on the ground and quickly stamped it out as he rushed into the military building. 

_ "Everyone in the basement bunkers right now, this is not a drill!"  _ Ludwig's voice echoed through the hallways, and he saw several soldiers rush towards their stations. He dashed through the building, checking every room to make sure everyone was responding accordingly. 

_ "Get to the bunkers as quickly and efficiently as you're able, and report roll call for your groups immediately!” _

 

* * *

 

Ludwig spoke into his radio to the sheltered groups as he checked the rooms quickly, one by one. 

“Group 1?”

“All Present.”

“Group 2?”

“Present.”

“Group 3?” 

“One Absent.” 

“Group 4?” 

“Present.”

“Group 3, who is missing?” He asked, feeling the ground’s rumbling getting closer by the second.

“The housekeeper; Braginski.” 

Ludwig felt a familiar nervousness ice his heart. He swallowed and his body tensed. 

“Has anyone seen her?” He finally answered. 

“The last anyone saw her she was in the front courtyard, sweeping, apparently.”

“Understood, I’m on it.”

“Lieutenant, you must come to a bunker immediately before the bombs strike; one absence, of housekeeping staff no less, isn’t significant enough to warrant search--”

Ludwig turned off his radio and ran to the courtyard, boots flying against the hardwood. As he opened the door, he noticed a broom left on the cobblestone, abandoned, and no Sofia. His eyes darted through the field and trees, looking for any sign of her. 

_ “Sofia!”  _ He yelled, cupping his hands to amplify the call. 

He opened his ears to hone in on any small sounds from the trees, trying to filter out the booming of the airstrike. 

He ran closer to the trees and called again. 

He waited again, hoping for an answer. 

“Ludwig?” A hushed voice called. Ludwig’s head turned towards an oak tree to his left, his eyes widened. 

“Yes,” He said, jogging towards the sound. “It’s me, are you okay?” 

“I can’t walk, it’s my kneecap.” 

Ludwig finally reached the oak tree, and found Sofia clinging to its trunk for stability. Her legs and dress were muddy and light scratches littered her face and limbs. 

Her right knee was stained a harsh blue and purple. 

Suddenly the ground shook again, hard enough to upset Sofia’s stance, making her cling to the tree harder. 

Ludwig looked up and saw the planes coming closer, their engines louder. 

“Come on, we have to go.” He said, his voice growing more urgent. 

“I can’t, my knee won’t heal… I’ve been out here for hours and it just…” 

Ludwig looked at her knee, bruised and battered. Of course her injuries didn’t heal; Ukraine’s borders were beyond collapsed, and her people were being gassed in his own camps, he thought bitterly. 

“I’ll help you walk,” He said, holding his hand out to her. “We have to get to the shelter.” 

“Okay.” She said, taking his hand, as they began to walk, Sofia hopping on her good leg. They cleared the woods, and as soon as they landed at the front of the building, bombs dropped close enough to them that Sofia fell forward, and Ludwig grasped her shoulder. They needed to move faster, he thought. 

“Sorry,” Ludwig said before lifting her torso and running through the building to find a bunker. 

Suddenly the ceiling in the hallway collapsed, bringing Ludwig to a halt, and he pivoted to run in the opposite direction. He ran towards another bunker, but bombs were already starting to touch down, destroying any possible entry points. He was running out of options. Running out of options, running out of time, running out of air… 

He kicked himself for panicking, and started running again towards his own office, still intact. The building continued rumbling beneath his feet, and he entered his office carrying Sofia and headed towards the closet. 

Just then, a bomb landed outside his office, sending wood splinters and debris shooting towards them like bullets. Ludwig turned away from the blast, hugging Sofia close to shield her with his back. Sharp blasts struck him, and he continued to carry Sofia towards the closet. Another blast. Metal and glass crushed into his body. 

“Ludwig?” Sofia said. Ludwig looked down at her and saw blood running over her forehead. Her eyes were dazed and confused. Ludwig narrowed his eyes, and surged toward the closet, using every muscle in his body. He shut the door with the two of them inside and sat on the floor, bombs still shaking the structure of the building. He looked at Sofia, unconsciously brushing the hair out of her face as he held her, her eyes blinking slowly as she coughed through the smoke. 

Ludwig’s eyes widened. Seeing and absorbing her pained state, he felt a strange angry stab in his heart. 

_ “We found her!” _

_ “Take her out.”  _

_ “Lieutenant?”  _

Ludwig felt his heart beat even faster and his mind was flooded with panic and fury and fear all at once. His eyes were locked with Sofia’s drowsy, unfocused ones. His gloved hands tightened around her. 

Something inside him snapped, and Ludwig found himself not wanting, possibly unable, to let go of her, his past terror linking to the exact moment he was experiencing. 

A bomb fell close to them, crushing the doors into Ludwig’s back. He shielded Sofia again, holding her tightly against his chest, determined to protect her from the debris. 

“No…” He muttered inadvertently, his entire being fixated on keeping her safe. He could feel Sofia’s heartbeat against him and kept focus by listening to her body’s cadence, and closing his eyes to feel where the bombs were landing. 


	7. found

Sofia stirred, waking up to an aching all over her body. She blinked, her vision blurry as she tried to recognize her surroundings, but found only darkness.

It was cramped, wherever she was. She coughed; the air all around her was full of smoke and dust and debris.  _Of course_ , she remembered;  _an airstrike hit the building._

"Hello?" She croaked, her throat badly irritated.

Suddenly her surroundings shifted. She felt someone's breath, and what felt like arms around her torso shaking slightly.

That pounding against her ear…

Sofia realized that sound wasn't far away bombings.

"Ludwig…?" She whispered, her eyes widened.

The body holding hers breathed slightly louder in response.

Sofia found herself suddenly very worried about how long they'd been stuck under here, with Ludwig using every ounce of his strength holding her.

"Ludwig, we need to get out of this debris, we'll just keep suffocating…"

Ludwig didn't respond.

"You have to let go so I can try to push the debris-"

Ludwig's arms tightened, and he pushed Sofia's head into his chest again, his breathing shaky, and started to shift his legs.

"Ludwig, stop, you're too hurt!"

Ludwig planted his feet and started to push his body upwards against the debris, his pained voice straining quietly. Sofia couldn't move against his strong hold, and shut her eyes tight, finding his hurt voice too distressing.

The wood and glass above them broke and scattered as Ludwig's back pushed through them, light bursting around them as they reached the surface.

Ludwig's body, completely drained of energy immediately fell backwards onto the rubble, finally letting go of Sofia. She rolled against a sheet of crumpled drywall about a foot away from him before collecting herself, getting on her hands and knees.

She froze at Ludwig's mangled form.

Burns ravaged his arms and legs, nearly melting his uniform into his skin. His face sustained deep cuts and bruises, and his back carried pieces of splintered wood and glass shards. Most frightening of all were the gashes on his neck.

A painful lump formed in Sofia's throat, and she swallowed, feeling tears form in her eyes. She cursed her fragile nerves for her reaction, urging herself to take action instead of being distressed, but she couldn't help it. The sight of him was too much to bear.

Her head desperately turned back and forth around the rubble, looking for anyone.

" _Help!"_ Her broken voice called. " _We ne-d -elp!"_

Tears streamed down her face as she looked at Ludwig again. His eyes were open half-way, limp, and they were pointed towards her.

"Oh no…" she murmured, covering her face as she wept.


	8. Recall

Ludwig awoke to an oxygen mask strapped to his face in what looked like an army medical building. He breathed deeply, feeling like his chest weighed a thousand pounds. He was propped up with some pillows, not completely lying down, but feeling unable to sit up much more.

_ Sofia.  _

He suddenly recalled the airstrike and Sofia’s bleeding face… 

His insides twisted with fear. 

He tried to move his arm and found that the weight of his own body was too much to handle at the moment. 

His mind remained focused on Sofia, trying to remember what happened as the bombs fell. He felt certain that she was secure in his arms the entire time, but she wasn’t in his arms or in front of him now, causing him to doubt his memory. 

He looked around again, seeing health monitors and his bed, and then suddenly a nurse entered the room. 

“Ah, you’re awake.” She said, walking over to the left side of the bed where the machines were. 

Ludwig used all the energy he could to move his hand to the nurse’s and loosely grasped it. 

She looked down at him, her eyes narrowed. 

“Sofia…” He mumbled. “Where is she…” 

“The woman we found with you?” She asked. 

Ludwig blinked slowly. 

“She’s not here, she had a fractured kneecap and some other minor ailments, so she’s been taken to the new building you’re to work in.”

Ludwig's hand fell, secure in the knowledge he'd gotten.

"You shouldn't stress so much; you have plenty of recovery to go." 

Ludwig disregarded her suggestion, but stayed in bed, knowing he’d be better much more quickly than she thought. 

Fragments of memory continued to piece together in his mind. 

_ “Ludwig, we--” _

_ “Push the debris--” _

_ “You’re too hurt--” _

_ “Help!” _

His heart fell. Why wasn’t she in a shelter in the first place? She shouldn’t have had to go through that.

Ludwig stopped his train of thought, a voice in his mind speaking up once again.

_ Stay away from her.  _

_ You are the physical embodiment of what's causing her suffering in this war.  _

_ Stay away. _

Ludwig took a deep breath and closed his eyes. She's better off if I stop worrying about her.   
She's better off without me. 

 

* * *

  
  


_ “If I’m not mistaken, I asked you to send these files to the mail room  immediately. Not sulk around my facilities and pester my staff. Did you perhaps mishear my instructions? Should I make them more clear for you?”  _

_ “No, sir.” Wilhelm responded, his eyes masking anger. _

_ “Excellent.” Ludwig hissed. “Fuck up basic instructions again and count on having much worse luck with me next time.”  _

_ “Understood.”  _

_ “Good. Get the fuck out of here.”  _

_ Ludwig turned his head to watch Wilhelm walk away, glaring at him.  _

_ Arrogant piece of shit.  _

_ He turned back to look at Sofia, still laying on the floor. He narrowed his eyes and kneeled down to her.  _

_ “Sofia.” He said softly.  _

_ She didn’t move. Ludwig gently held her wrist, and checked for a pulse.  _

_ She’s unconscious , he thought. The fall from Wilhelm’s strike was certainly harsh enough.  _

_ There weren’t any house staff to take her; Ludwig carefully reached his hands under her body and lifted her off the floor.  _

_ Once he reached her room, he placed her on her bed and turned to leave; but he couldn’t take another step. He turned around again.  _

_ There weren’t any nursing staff to take care of her…  _

**_She’ll heal._ **

_ Not quickly. _

**_Don’t touch her._ **

_ She’s in pain-- _

_ **It’s none of your business.** _

_ I have to-- _

**_You’ve done enough to her._ **

_ Ludwig looked at Sofia’s body on the bed, her nose bleeding and her head scratched up.  _

_ He shoved down his thoughts and went to his office to get a first aid kit.  _

 


	9. Acclimating

Ludwig placed the last of his belongings on the new desk, now meant to be his in this new work building. New to him anyway; technically speaking it was only a few years old. As soon as the Fuhrer came, military offices began popping out of the ground like daisies. This building was bigger than his previous one. 

He didn’t like it.

It was noisier and more populated, it felt like a place he could lose track of someone in. 

 _“Someone?”_ His mind repeated, accusingly.

He tsked at himself, shrugging off the thought, and placed his watch down on the wooden surface. That was the last of it. 

Speaking of “someone,” he hadn’t seen her all morning. 

She’s had a head start in the building since her injuries were more mild than his. Hopefully having other cleaning staff beside her has made things easier. 

He looked around. His new office was bigger too. He quickly took record of where he could sleep and then store away blankets. 

Just then someone knocked at the door. Ludwig turned and put his things down. 

“Come in.” He answered. 

The door swung open to reveal a new face in a general’s uniform. He wore his gold shoulder straps and sloped cap with an unusual confidence, looking at the office furniture with an expression of… disdain? Superiority? He couldn’t place it. 

Ludwig held out his arm upward in salute. 

"Yes, I heard we had an incoming lieutenant." He said, a smile creeping at the corner of his mouth. "You are Ludwig, yes?" 

Ludwig brought his arm down but remained at attention. "Yes sir. Ludwig Beilschmidt, first lieutenant, general staff." 

"Yes, of course. It's a shame about your offices, I'm sorry you've had to relocate-- but I think you're accustomed to that."

Ludwig felt a knot in his chest.

"Nevertheless all of your staff will work here now, so don't worry about having to learn too many names."

"Thank you sir."

"Speaking of, mine is Ernst Himmel. I run this facility, and we focus primarily on information correspondence." 

“Yes sir. I’m honored to meet you.” 

The man smiled with a glint in his eye radiating amusement. He teetered his head to look behind Ludwig at his desk. 

“You’re unpacking your things, yes?” 

“Yes sir.” 

He walked around him towards the desk, prompting the knot in Ludwig to fall into his core. Picking up a fountain pen, Ernst spoke again. 

“So the air raid.” 

Ludwig swallowed, closing his eyes for a moment. 

“You handled that very… uniquely I’d say.” 

“Sir?” He asked, nerves bound tighter with each second.

“Well yes.” He put the pen down and walked around the desk back to face Ludwig again. Casually, he pulled a metal case from his breast pocket and extracted a cigarette. 

“You abandoned protocol for… A maid?” He said quizzically as he lit the smoke. 

“Yes… sir.” Ludwig responded. 

“Right right…” Ernst replied, taking a drag. “She is a prisoner from Ukraine, is that right?” 

“Yes sir.” 

“And you broke protocol because she was not in a bunker on time?”

“...Yes sir.”

He chuckled. “She’s a Slav and a woman. Of course she was not on time.” He tapped his cigarette, ash sprinkling onto the carpet.

Ludwig didn’t answer, finding it difficult to find the right response. 

“I’m joking. You can laugh if you want.” He said, smiling. 

“Of course, sir.” Ludwig answered, feigning a grin. 

Ernst hummed, and walked very close towards Ludwig.

“We don’t get too many men like you around here.” He said, blowing smoke into Ludwig’s face. He strained, trying not to cough, and shut his eyes. 

“Y’know. Hero types.”

Ludwig looked into Ernst’s eyes as blankly as he could manage, his stomach churning. 

Ernst threw up his shoulders, shrugging and walking a few paces from Ludwig. “Even when we do, they don’t tend to last too long.” He put out his cigarette on the desk, leaving a burn. “Not popular I suppose.” 

He turned towards the door. 

“Regardless, Ludwig, we are honored to have you here with us.” He opened the door. 

“Thank you, sir.” Ludwig responded. 

“Of course.” He said, raising his hand to salute, followed by Ludwig. There was a smirk on his face before he turned to leave, his eyes gleaming as if he knew something about Ludwig that even he couldn’t know.

The door closed and Ludwig breathed out, blinking his eyes tiredly. He’d never craved a cigarette more than this moment, he realized, reaching for the pack on his desk.  

**Author's Note:**

> Review if you'd like to read more; I'm going to try my best to update weekly but other work can get in the way.
> 
> Thank you


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